just 2 more to go!
hai! 2 more tests to go and I am free! for thanksgiving! finally.. i've been studying and working and all that for so long. really really need a break. i had to wake up at 6:45 today cuz i had a stupid econ test at 8.... im so tired now. i've been studying ever since i got home, but of cuz.. my studying time consists of eating.. walking around.. playing with kiska.. giving kiska her dinner.. lookin for someone to chat with.. lookin around for things to get for my car and house.. clean a little bit.. taking kiska out for a walk.. staring at the wall.. etc etc. but im still so tired. im almost done for my studying for tomorrow's test. But after that i got study for thursday's test. yup I am SO hardworking.
I have a song by Christina Milian in my itunes for a long time but i never really listened closely to the lyrics till today (yes part of my study time). there's this line that says "Sometimes the things that don't seem right / Leads to the best thing of a life". And I kinda agree with that too. Cuz it says 'sometimes'. And those 'sometimes' can range from eating chocolate to skipping school to go to the mall to loving someone ur not supposed to. Well, i guess maybe not the 'best thing of a life' but sometimes it's just.. if you try to do everything that seems right to the society for your whole life, you really cant feel really happy. I get happy when I skipped school to hang out with my friends, and that doesn't really seem like the right thing to do. To me, i kinda feel that having occasional happiness is a lot better than waiting for that forever happiness that will (to me) never come. And I'm really thankful for those occasional happiness cuz they make my life just a little more exciting.
anyways, ah ma!!!!!!!!! i'm so glad you visited cuz i couldn find your email too!! mine's okriskao@hotmail.com.. please email me!!! i miss you sooooooooo much! can't wait to see you when i go back to sg!!
I've been worrying
I never really wanted a boyfriend when I came over to America cuz I dont really want to.. i duno. I believe that I've changed quite a bit. I had many many exes back in Sg and I had a feeling like I want one too when I was in high school in Mobile, just that I was too shy and I don't really talk in school haha. But when I came to Auburn, I didn really want to have a boyfriend anymore. I dont really want to expose myself, let myself be easily taken advantage of. I don't really trust many. Many friends but I do not really trust them as much as when I was back in Sg.
But what now? I've trusted one so much. I've opened up, to someone who's not even.. I cannot think of life without.. What if we start to talk less and slowly not talk anymore? Can I imagine my life like that? It is very dangerous for me now. A few days ago, my manager told my colleagues that even though im only 17 (turning 18 soon!), I am actually very mature. I duno why she said that for, but I guess its a compliment.. ... I know what I need to do in my life. I know what's important. But someone. I am willing to give up anything for.. Am I in love? I don't want to say that I am cuz it is very dangerous for me to fall in love cuz I think I am one of those who would give up "my daily bread"(as mommy says) for love. Therefore, I really do not want to have a boyfriend until I find someone who has all the characteristics I want in my future husband.
anyways, love is pretty complicated. i prefer accounting.
My colleague, more of a friend now, gave me a ride home from work today. We had to go over to another restaurant to pick up her fiance and when we got there, she went in and saw a bartendress there who worked in my restaurant once. she told me that she doesnt really like that girl, lets name her B, so naturally I asked her why is that. She told me that B flirts too much, doesnt know her limits, even with her fiance. I asked her if B's like touchy touchy type and she's like yea. She said her fiance even try to shrug B off and stuff and B even tried to text msg her fiance but my friend replied to her saying he's playing games haha.. She said B prolly doesn't really realize that she doesn know her limits but still.
I duno... I never really like being touchy touchy with guys unless they are pretty close friends or i like them. Guys try to hug me and stuff and I duno I just feel uneasy having guys touching touching and stuff. So it kind of bothers me when I see girls being sooooooooo flirty. My colleagues say I'm pretty flirty haha but I think they think that way because when I see my guy friends I will talk to them and stuff and I always try to be polite so I always smile. I wonder if guys think like my colleagues -- that I'm flirting. I hope not.
When I turn 18, I am going to open a savings account with ING Direct. I am being very generous and introducing this to everyone. Visit the website
here. The Orange Savings account has a 4.40% Annual Percentage Yield, which is probably the highest I have found among all banks that do not steal your money with service charges and all that hidden charges and stuff. ING Direct operates worldwide so I believe that they are pretty trustworthy. Please check them out and earn some moneY!
